have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
