Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
This house was built for laser tag.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
