I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
