i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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