these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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