We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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