That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
My penis needs a shock collar
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
