names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
There's always time for handjobs
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
The Olympian is in my bed
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Randomize
