where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
