I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Randomize
