I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
