how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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