So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
