hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
