So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
kristin has been a bad kristin
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize