wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Randomize
