if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize