there's paper in my vomit.
Barsexuality is the new black.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
