Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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