im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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