It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
So squirting runs in the family.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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