I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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