My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize
