so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
BRING THE BAGELS
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
