is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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