i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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