Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize