he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
