Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
