So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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