i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize