Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(301): View more from Maryland

I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.

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(301): View more from Maryland

he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.

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(618): View more from Illinois

you should give me head with plastic fangs in

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(973): View more from New Jersey

i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?

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(206): View more from Washington

My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town

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(231): View more from Michigan

the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants

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(775): View more from Nevada

He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself

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(417): View more from Missouri

He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.

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