Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I think a kid would responsible me up
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
