He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
