I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
