He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
