Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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