: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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