so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
