Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
