I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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