I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
