I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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