Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
