should my penis look like a turkey
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize