you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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