If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
