Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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