it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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