He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
