We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
