It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
