That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
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